Well no, not really. But…ever notice how quickly your child’s words can hurt you? A quick ka-pow! to the face can seem a walk in the park compared to the searing pain in your heart when your child rejects you.
For the most part, I’m not on the receiving end of Sweet Girl’s less-than-kind comments. It’s my husband who is.
At least once a day he gets told: “Go away! I don’t want you. I want Mommy.”
I’m not totally immune. Every once in a while Sweet Girl turns not-so-sweet on me and will say: ” I don’t like you anymore.”
This is usually in response to being told no, she is not getting a treat at 7:30 in the morning. Face it, kid. It’s not going to happen.
In any case, I had a talk with my husband about the way Sweet Girl disses him left and right. He doesn’t like it (obviously) and joked he’d rather be punched in the face than receive that kind of rejection from her.
I know children play favourites with their parents. I can only assume it will be a matter of time before Sweet Girl realizes her dad is pretty awesome. I’ll become the parent who sits on the sidelines while they build puzzles together, brush their teeth, eat cookies. Whatever.
But right now, the sideline parent is a tough gig for my husband. We know she doesn’t mean to be hurtful. We talk to her about the power of words and the importance of being kind.
We recognize Sweet Girl is simply expressing a preference for how she wants her world to be. After all, it’s hard being a toddler when much of your life is out of your control (i.e. told you need to get up at this time, need to go to daycare, need to have a bath, need to eat your vegetables, need to go to sleep, etc.)
It’s a good thing my husband is a good storyteller. Each night before going to sleep, Sweet Girl asks her dad to tell her a story. She’s not interested in me doing this. Her dad’s stories are the best. She knows it. I do too.
* Image sourced via nootles.com.au
7 Responses to “I’d rather be punched in the face”
Krista
I think the fact that they have a special story-time is fantastic! My three boys are constantly playing favourites and they are never consistent. Haha!
Melany Gallant
Hi Krista, It’s really cute when Sweet Girl asks for the same story again and again (as toddlers tend to do), and it’s hilarious watching my husband try and remember the story exactly as he told it previously. Actually, I should start recording them for posterity!
As for playing favourites, I know my time as the fav parent is numbered…
Chantal
my kids bounce back and forth with the favourite parent thing. If it makes you feel better my 11yo has grown out of it. But that being said, he comes to me for different types of support than he does for my husband. Sometimes it upsets me but I know I have to let him do what he is comfortable with.
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ayala
Hard to be a sideline parent…they play both sides. It’s just a phase.
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Melany Gallant
Good reminder, Ayala! Only a phase (parent-of-a-toddler mantra!)
Tweepwife
I just want to note that she doesn’t say that she doesn’t like him. She tells him to go away because she wants you. If you really listen to that message, via toddler speak, she is just stating a fact that has nothing to do with who she loves or likes. She just knows what/who she wants or needs at that moment. She will learn to finesse it. But by then she will actually scream, ‘I hate you, and I hate this house!” Now THAT is worse than a punch in the face so consider this practice, lol. In all honesty, she is likely just sorting out roles and who does what. His bedtime story is apparently full of awesomesauce.
Tweepwife recently posted..Words Hurt, but Words Heal
Melany Gallant
Good point, Mary. I never considered looking at her words in the light of “toddler speak”. I love knowing parents like you who have been there/done that and have such sage advice. And I definitely will consider this “practice” for the teen years. Ha!