I recently turned 40 years old. And I love my age. On my birthday I practically shouted to the roof tops about it. In fact, I did shout it out on Facebook. My friends and family graciously congratulated me.

And I think congratulations are in order. Not for reaching this milestone so much as for choosing happiness.

I’m a much happier person at 40 than I was at 20. It’s too bad I didn’t have the self-confidence and drive back then to make my own happiness. I probably would have made some different life choices.

Like opting not to wear chambray shirts.

I see those hipsters trying to bring chambray back into fashion, and I ask you – why? Nobody over the age of 10 looks good in chambray. Nobody.

But perhaps my chambray wardrobe choice of days gone-by has helped make me who I am today. Because eventually I looked at photos of myself in my sleeveless, button-down chambray shirt and said no, there must be a better way. And that’s the path I pursued. And it’s all about the journey, right? (more…)

I am so far behind. On everything. And while I try not to sweat the small stuff, all that small stuff adds up to become big stuff.

Work projects, home projects, hobby projects, and yes writing projects are behind schedule. My last blog post was almost a month ago. I hate that.

I’ve got lists – shopping lists, chore lists, project task lists and even blog content lists (aka ed cals) – to help me prioritize. And get myself organized! But these lists are getting longer – not smaller. And it’s causing neglect. I don’t like neglect.

I feel like a hamster spinning myself in circles trying to do everything and be everywhere. So silly. I can only do my best. At the same time I recognize that life is about choices.

The Gallant family returned from a two-week vacation last week. While we travelled west to visit family and re-introduce Sweet Girl to aunts, uncles and cousins she doesn’t get to see all that often, I thought for sure I would have time to shorten a few of these lists. To write a few posts.

It didn’t work out that way. In part because each day was busy! But mostly because I chose to fill my time visiting with siblings, nieces and nephews I wish lived a lot closer than they do. I pushed those lists aside knowing the repercussions.

But I needed a break from the hamster wheel. Because while it’s my choice to do or not do, to take on more and keep busy, I like a lot of people have a hard time saying no. No to others. But also no to myself.

So this is my confession of imperfection. I know the power and choice is in me to get things done. But I can’t do it all. Things are slipping through the cracks. I know this. I am doing everything I can to seam up the fissures. Some metaphorical sewing and mending is in order!

At the same time, I’m realizing that my sanity depends on me not stressing out on all of the above. I’m learning. I’m trying – doing everything I can – to roll with it. And not spin myself into oblivion.

“Life on the hamster wheel” – Spinning and spinning…

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Image source

“Life on the hamster wheel” photo credit to Dr. Doug Frain and his photo collection of Toronto graffiti. As Dr. Frain explains on his site:

One of the most enjoyable aspects of graffiti is its artistic simplicity and whimsical approach to rather profound concepts. This recreational public art can be artistically enjoyed as well as thoughtfully contemplated.

Yes indeed.

Blogging is such an interesting outlet. I’ve been writing almost my entire life (short stories, poetry, journaling) but nothing compares to blogging.

I’ve been doing it for about seven years now on sites across the Interweb. Most of it in a professional capacity – blogging as part of my job. It’s my favourite part of the work I do. It’s my passion.

Which is why you’d think I’ve blogged a lot longer in my personal life but not so. I’ve only really been doing it steadily since 2009. And it all comes down to a struggle to find my voice. To see the words on the web page and say yes, this is me. And know it. (more…)

I’ve been known to lose myself a time or two in a thesaurus. So many words! And one word leads you to another. Jumping from synonym to antonym, and back again. It’s like a story unfolding but with an unconventional plot.

No predictions of where the next word will take you. Simply an adventure in vocabulary.

To me, words are delicious. Some more than others. I’ve touched on this point before (le beurre d’arachide anyone?).

And we all know words hold power. Good and bad yes, but I like that words can be used as a mantra. A statement repeated into truth. A promise to the future.

Lara at Wellman-Wilson Consulting recently shared her three words for 2013, and challenged others to do the same. The goal is to identify three words that represent how you will focus your energy this year.

Hmm…this challenge got me thinking. And here’s what I’ve decided.  (more…)

I really, really like the song Blood Brothers by Ingrid Michaelson which I discovered on the weekend while reading a book. A not-so-great romance novel but still. Some good came out of that read since the way this song was referenced caught my attention.

It’s such an earworm that I have it on constant replay these days on my iPod. I listen to it in the car on my way to work (and home again). I listen to it while prepping dinner. I sing it to myself (under my breath of course) perusing the grocery aisle. Yes, I’m stuck on this song.

The video of “Blood Brothers” is a time-lapse of Ingrid getting morphed into various famous people. Pretty crazy what make-up artists can do to recreate a person into someone new (or something else for that matter). Check it out.

Life anthems

I like how a specific song can be the perfect fit for how I’m feeling. An anthem or theme song for my life. For a short while anyway.

(Case in point: Where Them Girls At was my previous life anthem. Hey, sometimes you just need a song with a good beat you can dance to.)

With how crappy the end of 2012 was and me wanting to bury myself in a book all the time, I could use some uplifting reminders about the goodness of people. That “what I need you need too.” That we’re all in this together. In all the ways life manifests itself.

What’s a song on permanent replay for you right now?

Earwormin’ it…

** Phonograph photo credit to Ingrid Michaelson